I’ve been thinking about this on and off and I believe that I started this blog too soon. Things are starting up again spiritually for me and I know that in the future I will have a lot to share online about it, but I feel like I’m placing too much pressure on it for it to do develop. It is my intention to continue with the blog, but I am going to start from scratch with a new page and title when I do. I will be sure to share on here the link when it happens.
So until then, an update: Right now in my mundane life I am in the hiring process of getting the job I think will really work for me. It’s very independent and relaxed. A week after my birthday (in March) I decided to get back in touch with my mom. Things are right back to normal before we had our issues. In fact, I actually visited with them for a day. It was really nice and we message each other pretty consistently.
Now for the spiritual part….
Things have picked up really fast! I have classes with a new spiritual group in the town I live. It’s hosted at a metaphysical store that is really awesome. I have some connections to possibly start of my ceramics and I can sell them at the metaphysical store! She even sells her stuff at the different events I thought of doing if I wanted to travel and sell them.
Last weekend I participated in a Reiki 1&2 class and got my attunement on Sunday. I have been very very ill all week and I believe it was all apart of the process of the attunement of breaking me down to build me back up. Friday I finally have my big revelation that has needed to happen for a while. I found Persephone! It was through a dream and it was very vague. As I started to journal it, I realized that I’m never going to meet Persephone in the way I have Hades, because Persephone resides within me. I am a piece of her in this timeline.
With that being said, I have to work on the process of breaking away my ego. When I was going through the reiki class, it really brought out a lot of anger and resistance. Thinking about it now, I believe that it was my ego being afraid and threatened by the change that comes from reiki, a good change. You see, I have a lot of barriers and walls built up and I believe that has been the reason that it has taken so long for me to find Persephone. She is radiant, life and originality. There are parts of that that have different associations that made/make me feel initially hesitant.
I think it’s just all of the defenses I have built up. To be yourself, to be open and to have an open heart makes you vulnerable. But if I open myself up, allow myself to be her vessel and to embrace all that is radiant in me, I’ll be the better for it. I just have a lot of internal work to do and it’s all for the better.
Something that has helped me in making my decision was this video talking about identity by Lune Innate. I’ll be sure to share it. It came out right when I needed it, because it just really relates to everything I am experiencing right now.
I hope that you enjoyed this blog. I know I built it up and didn’t follow through, but I feel like it has its completion. As I said, I fully intend to continue on with a new blog, but I need it to be free of the ego and resistance that I have placed in this blog. I wish you all well.